Word was it in my old Italian Catholic neighborhood that the Irish monsignor of the local parish kept African Americans from buying houses by warning realtors not to sell to them. The monsignor wasn’t just some guy in a black suit. When he spoke, people listened. He had his ways.

So, it’s no surprise to me that ProtectMarriage.com, which is spearheading the anti-gay marriage initiative (Prop 8) in California, is using similar strong-arm tactics to try and get businesses who have donated to the "No on 8" effort to give them dough as well. In a letter sent to these establishments, the anti-gay bigots (which include representatives of the California Catholic Conference, and the Church of Jesus Christ of the Latter Day Saints) have threatened to publicly reveal the names of businesses contributing to the effort to keep gay marriage legal. Blackmail, anyone?

It’s all very gangster-esque. I won’t say Mafioso, as newspapers have described it, since as an Italian I am sensitive to being stereotyped as someone who carries a violin case and “tawks like dat.”

Apparently, the letter is perfectly legal but ironic coming from individuals who are against gay marriage on so-called moral grounds. Is it moral to threaten to hurt someone’s livelihood because you think you have god on your side? Is it moral to tell them that if they don’t comply, they will be branded as anti-”traditional” marriage, whatever that is?

Consider the sources. With the exception of a few individual priests and nuns, the Catholic Church was absent in the Civil Rights movement of the 50s and 60s as it was from any resistance movement against the nazis. Until the 70s the Mormons proposed that black skin color was a curse from god. They wouldn’t let blacks into their exclusive white people’s club. Let’s not even talk about their attitudes toward women.

These days, the Catholics and Mormons won’t let queers in. At least not the out front kind. Their closeted clergy no doubt number in the thousands.

Gay marriage is not a radical idea. What could be more apple pie and all-American than wanting to tie the knot with another person “until death do you part?”

A more liberated idea would be to eliminate marriage altogether, for everyone. As far as I am concerned, the state has no business legitimatizing anyone’s relationship. Marriage originally came about to protect property rights. It had nothing to do with love. In fact, many marriages back in the “good old days” were arranged. Our Hallmark version of marriage is a recent concept.

Be that as it may, if the institution is going to exist, it shouldn’t be an exclusively heterosexual one. No more than it should be for one race or another.

That’s supposedly the foundation of our country. Tell that to the Catholics and Mormons who support Prop 8.

Tommi Avicolli Mecca is an ex-catholic southern Italian atheist queer with a website: www.avicollimecca.com