FARM BOYS

Farm Life on this farm is not that unusual. And, I have heard many of them. After all, what is a farm boy going to do in all that open space except maybe getting corn-holed once in awhile. This doesn’t mean that Farmers are necessarily Gay – it probably has more to do with boredom and availability.

In this story we see a static set -- a front porch of the Farm House where a returning Farm Boy, who lived in this house for a time, with a Farm Veterinarian He has recurring images of his child hood where he grew up. We learn about his unhappy relationship with his father, and how he meets the Vet, who is just newly divorced. These are all fine and good stories, but something is not working here. The acting is pretty good. Not great, but passable. I tend to believe that the reason this play doesn’t work is that the play is not very well written. It has been extracted from Will Fellow’s book ‘Farm Boys: Lives of Gay Men from the Rural Midwest. With permission from Fellows, Dean Gray and Amy Fox turned this story into a stage drama. Unfortunately the story churns along slower than a pea pod trying to peek out of the field. Life may be boring on the farm – but this farm is buried in hay.


John arrives from New York. He has inherited the farm from the country Animal Doc. What to do, what to do? That is the question that John mulls over and over and over. With him is his insipid lover who asks a bunch of dumb questions about farm equipment. Now really, even if you live in New York you can’t be that dim witted. The ex-wife of the Doc is there to help John with the house. Well, isn’t that cozy? The Vet’s ex-wife is a friend with her ex’s live in boyfriend. And, she is not in the will. She is way too sweet. This would have been the perfect place to bring in a “Hush, Hush Sweet Charlotte” character. Maybe that would have brought John out his doldrums. Broke Back Mountain this ain’t. There is very little tension. There are no hints of sexuality. They have a scrim or something in the back of the stage where they could have done some kind of a silhouette image of the Doc and John at least embracing with the straps of their bib overalls hanging over their shoulders. That would take the robot like movements out of the play.

And this would be funny, if it weren’t meant to be serious. The Lover that John has brought with him from New York, wants to turn the Farm into a Dance Art Center. He is joking isn’t he? He demonstrated his dancing skills to us on the stage – and, if this were American Idol…they would have bought him a one way ticket out of town. Does he really believe that the local yokels will let him set up a dancing school next to their haystacks? If this were done as TV’s Green Acres – it would have been hilarious.

Finally, there is this. These actors who I have seen in other plays are above this mediocre play. In this play – everyone is miscast, or totally wasted in the simplistic presentation. What I suggest they do is to scrap this project and get back to the drawing board. As John says in the play: “I don’t know who I am here”…is exactly what I was thinking. But I would ad: …and what am I doing here.

Cast: Brian Levy, Matt Socha, Norman Munoz, Scarlett Hepworth and Bradly Mena. Out of this cast the most intriguing is Bradly Mena, who plays a farm boy, who is curious and gay, but doesn’t know how to deal with it yet. If there were a bright spot here -- he would be it.

Directing by Dennis M. Lickteig: Leaden

RATING: ONE GLASS OF CHAMPAGNE!!! (Four is best!)

OH OSCAR – YOU CUTE LITTLE THING!


Jamie Foxx and Jennifer Hudson in Dream Girls

Here is what my Voodoo doll tells me. The best pix will be ‘Babel’. Why, because the other nominees will cancel themselves out leaving ‘Babel’ with the most votes.

The Queen, Helen Mirren, will remain the Queen. She will always be remembered as a Queen. After all, she has played the Original Queen Elizabeth and now the current Q.E.
Ooops, my Voodoo doll just dropped a pick up stick and it says that there could be a ground swell for Meryl Streep for her ‘bitchy but wonderful role’ in “The Devil Wears Prada. Sure, it would be an upset, and not likely – but wouldn’t it be delicious. I can see Oscar smiling right now. He likes upsets, you know.

Best Actor: Voodoo person is adamant that Oscar will go to Peter O’Toole. Oh, she knows that Forest Whitaker might get it. But, keep in mind that Whitaker is really a supporting role. They bounced him up to the Best Actor Category. Besides, O’Toole has never won an Oscar except for an honorary one. Voodoo Queen has got that incense going – and it says O’Toole.

Best Supporting Actor will go to Eddie Murphy for his role in ‘Dreamgirls’. Oscar likes to see comics take on a serious role. Think back. Many comics have won awards. If anyone could challenge this lofty position it could be Mark Wahlberg (The Departed). But, then that would be a huge departure for Oscar, wouldn’t it?

Best Supporting Actress. She went from singing on Cruise Ships to being a Movie Star and was dissed by Simon (American Idol). “You’re completely out of your league” – he told Jennifer Hudson on the show. And he was allegedly heard to say recently: “The moment I saw her, I thought Oscar.” Of course that was after she was nominated. Hmmm. My Voodoo Doll has some advice for Miss Hudson. – “Put that Oscar where it will really pain him”.

Martin Scorsese will most likely get the Golden Cutie for “The Departed” for two reasons. The competition will probably knock each other out and Scorsese has never won that prize and Oscar is feeling a little sentimental this year. My Voodoo Bitch Doll – sez “Oscar will be sitting on Scorsese’s mantle soon.”

Al Gore will score with “An Inconvenient Truth” in the Best Documentary Feature category. Why is that? Well, Oscar has seen the light and he wants to continue to see it. “Voodoo Queen” adds this. “Gore, will wait till Barack and Clinton do each other in, then he will jump in and announce that he will run for Prez.” She also gets political and sez “And he will win providing they don’t mess with the votes. Barack will be his running mate choice.” Voodoo Queen is putting me in a tight spot.

The above are my Voodoo Queen Doll’s choices. And if they don’t pan out – there will be a nice fire in the fireplace just waiting for some Voodoo. That will shut her up.

WANNA SEE THE NOMINATED FILMS IN S.F?

HERE IS WHERE THEY ARE PLAYING.

“Letters From Iwo Jima” 4 nominations. At the Landmark Embarcadero.

“The Queen” 6 Nominations. At the Embarcadero Center Cinema in Sf. And the Shattuck in Berkeley and Landmark’s Piedmont Theatre in Oakland.

“The Departed” – 5 nominations. At Landmark Lumiere Theatre and the Shattuck in Berkeley.

“Volver” Best Actress Nominee (Penelope Cruz) At Landmark’s Clay, The Albany Twin in Albany and The Guild in Menlo Park.

“Venus” Best Actor nominee Peter O’Toole. At the Landmark Embarcadero, and the Shattuck in Berkeley.

“Pan’s Labyrinth” 6 nominations including Best Foreign Language Film. Now at the Landmark Shattuck in Berkeley.

“Little Children” 3 Nominations, including Best Actress and Best Supporting Act. Now at the Shattuck in Berkeley.

“The Last King of Scotland” Best Actor nominee for Forest Whitaker. At the Landmark Shattuck – Berkeley.

“Dreamgirls” – 8 nominations, including two supporting actor/actress nominations. At the Landmark Calif. Theatre in Berkeley.

THE SILVER SCREEN FLICKERS FOR YOU. YOU NEED TO SEE THESE FILMS SO THAT YOU WILL KNOW IF ‘OSCAR’ KNOWS WHAT HE IS TALKING ABOUT. I’LL BE WATCHING CLUTCHING MY LITTLE ‘FAKE’ OSCARETTE.



The Photo of Lee Hartgrave Boy Reporter is by Jim Ferreira – Film Noir & Hollywood Glamour. www.lafterhall.com.

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