A FOUR LETTER WORD

IT’S SEX AND THE CITY CROSSED WITH DESPERATE HOUSWIFES. At first you might think,”Why am I watching this stereotypical Gay movie with a plot that seems pretty shop-worn?” That’s what I thought at first – but as it goes along, this story about being young, gay and living in New York (think ‘Queer as Folk’) manages to keep your attention. Of course there are the ‘skin’ scenes, but along the way there is a message about love and trust.

Here is the big question in the relationship between Luke (Jesse Archer) who makes rabbits seem tame in the sex department and the new boy that he meets (Charlie David.). Here is the problem with the love affair. Luke sleeps with anyone that is still breathing and Stephen works as a Hustler. Luke doesn’t know this at first. But does he have any room to complain? After all – he is always on the make. However, he does do it for free.

It’s a low-budget film with some good acting along the way and some really bad scenes where you can tell that they are acting – then it surprises you with some very funny lines and the story is pretty realistic of Gay men when they are young in a big City.

Probably the most interesting story among the many plot lines is the one about the Black/White couple. Their relationship gets into trouble because they don’t agree on little things like house keeping and where you leave your toothbrush. Also interesting are the scenes in the Porno shop where the obnoxious Luke works. I say work – but it seems that he does very little and is always late and gets away with it.

Charlie David as the good-looking Hustler is probably the most believable. Also Cory Grant as Zeke from the Porn Shop is great. There is a silly Wedding shower where everyone wears drag. It goes on too long – and just didn’t do anything for the film. I can think of a FOUR LETTER word for that segment.

AT THE LANDMARK THEATRES

RATING: TWO BOXES OF POPCORN!!
--trademarked—


Michael Jackson and Marilyn Monroe look-a-likes in Mister Lonely. Courtesy photo.

MISTER LONELY – GENIUS FILMMAKING

BOBBY DARRIN HAD A BIG HIT CALLED "MR. LONELY" – AND IT IS SUNG IN THIS GORGEOUS INDIE FILM – MISTER LONELY.

Although the song came out in the 60’s Mr. Lonely is just as pertinent today as it was then. Here are some of the lyrics…

“Now, I’m a soldier, a lonely soldier
Away from home through no wish of my own
That’s why I’m lonely, I’m Mr. Lonely
I wish that I could go back home”

Mister Lonely the movie is a bit bizarre. But, if you have seen a Harmony Korine film you should expect some really subtle black humor. There is the man who rides a tiny motorcycle imitating Michael Jackson. Tied to the Motor Cycle is a Monkey Puppet that hits the ground and then floats up in the air.

Yes it’s weird. There is a Marilyn Monroe look-a-like. And yes she does wear the famous dress that Marilyn had on in the Seven Year Itch. You know the one --- it’s the one that blows up in the air as she stands on a New York Subway Vent. The Marilyn in this movie is married to a guy who is Charlie Chaplin. Then there are the Nuns who smoke. One of them falls out of an airplane while the Nunnery is trying to drop rice to people in the Jungle. She falls out of the plane with the rice and prays on the way down to God to save her. Miracle! He does. She hits the ground, but gets up and walks away. This scene is absolutely gorgeous.

Along the way we meet Shirley Temple, James Dean herding sheep and the Pope, who has a glass of wine in his hand. Then along comes ‘Buckwheat’ from the old Black and White films. He is in the chicken pen. It turns out that he wants to be a chicken. Also in this very bizarre group of people…Little Red Riding Hood comes skipping down the road.

All of the people mentioned are look-a-likes. And most look amazingly like the Celebs. The imagery is fabulous. Michael Jackson entertains at an old folks retirement home and does all the Jackson moves including the Crotch Grab. One of the old-folks is pounding a small hammer to his head with the beat of the Jackson rock music. The Old-Folks are the lonely, and the entertainers are also the Lonely. They have all gravitated together, because they need each other.

Werner Herzog pilots the plane that the missionary Nun falls out of. Herzog gives an absorbing performance. The Missionary Nun scenes are other worldly, and enchanting. You really do believe that God lets her float gently to the ground.

Korine is a Master filmmaker. Mister Lonely is a wonderful journey and an amazing canvas of beauty.

AT THE LANDMARK THEATRES

RATING: FOUR GLASSES OF CHAMPAGNE!!!! (highest rating) – trademarked-


Jazz Singer Suede at Nikko Hotel on June 8. Courtesy Photo.

SUEDE – A VELVET VOICE SINGER

Suede, the popular jazz singer invokes memories of Billy Holiday, Jerry Southern and other greats. However, Suede puts her own touch of each song. She sure is her own stylist. For instance with the Sammy Cahn and DePaul song “Teach Me Tonight”, that is one of my favorites, she starts out with a tinkling piano and smooth come hither lyrics. You can just see yourself in a piano bar in the 50’s and 60’s with your first love, hoping someone will ‘Teach’ you tonight. What is different about Suede is that she goes from the softness to bring in a gritty quality later on in the song.

Another lovely song is the famous “Never, Neverland” (Comden and Green) from Peter Pan. For a few minutes, you’ll think you are on Fire Island. I’ll have another Martini please. Thank you waiter.

Suede can take you anywhere you want to be. All you have to do is sit back and you can imagine everyone you ever loved…everyone that ever loved you…and all the ones that have left you – or that you have left. Her new C.D “dangerous mood” is out now

With lyrics like this from “Love and Regret” – “I’ve held it on the inside – wouldn’t show it on the outside”…is one of the reasons the C.D is called ‘dangerous mood’. It’s a wonderful story song that will surely stir up some memories.

To find that beloved one, you must have faith. And that’s what you’ll get in Suede’s head spinning version of “Here’s To Life.” Mellow and electrifying beyond belief. Yes, there are tantalizing tales in ‘dangerous mood’. This one comes from the heart.

EXTRA: Want to see “Suede” in person? Yes, you can -- Sunday June 8, at the Nikko Hotel (across from the Hilton.) Show starts at 8PM. The Club is on the first floor. This is a one night only love affair. And there are bound to be “Sparks” a-plenty! EXTRA, EXTRA! Suede has performed at many benefits for the Gay Community.

C.D. RATING: FOUR GLASSES OF CHAMPAGNE!!!! (highest rating) –trademarked-

(((Lee Hartgrave has contributed to the San Francisco Chronicle Sunday Datebook and produced a long-running Arts segment on KQED FM)))


Dessay in Lucia. Courtesy Photo.

BUZZIN’ FAVORITES

Musical, The Musical at the Lesher Theatre in Walnut Creek. “You want the Wow factor? They don’t get any Wowier than this!”

“Bug” at the SF Playhouse. Dynamite performances in this creepy play. “Gabriel Marin gives a shattering performance that you won’t ever forget. It’s breathtaking!”

“Octopus” at the Magic Theatre. Bring your Raincoat cause’ it’s gonna rain. A Powerful passionate play about love and trust – and how sex can get you into trouble. “Astonishing in every aspect!” Miss this at your own risk!

HERE’S WHAT BUZZIN’ IS LOOKING FORWARD TO ...

“Hair Spray” at The Orpheum. Yep…the Turnblatt’s are back in town. As a matter of fact I’m talking to Mrs. Turnblatt tomorrow about her weight problem. Read the entire conversation next week -- right here.

And I guess you’ve heard…the purple haired one Dame Edna is still alive and still has purple hair. She will be in town very soon. How will we know her, you ask? Just look for a Camel Caravan with her on the lead Camel. Of course, the slaves will be fanning her with big Ostrich fans.

The S.F. Playhouse will be bringing “Cabaret” in. It will certainly be interesting to see what this Cracker Jack Company will do with that. That’s what I like about the Playhouse – they always do some unexpectedly brilliant things that are just astonishing. One of the Best Companies in town, hands down! Well – in this case, lets make it Hands Up and clapping!

Darren Romeo, who is the protégé of Siegfried and Roy, has just been awarded a Merlin Award for Lifetime Achievement from the international Magicians Society. The award is presented to magicians and illusionists who have achieved the highest level in their craft. He’s in good company with the likes of David Copperfield and others of equal fame. Romeo, the voice of Magic, a theatrical extravaganza that combines music, song and magic, is now playing at the Post Street Theatre. Oh, Mr. Magic man – can I take a ride on a Magic Carpet? Early reports: They say that he has charm and wit and had the audience clapping and cheering during previews.

MADNESS ON THE BIG SCREEN AT THE BALL PARK!

IT WILL BE GLORIOUS. It will be under the stars – unless it’s too foggy to see the Stars at AT&T Park. I’m talking about Lucci di Lammermour – Donizetti’s powerful Opera. Natalie Dessay (Lucia) will be driven mad at the Opera House on June 20. At the same time it will be simulcast at AT&T Park on a huge digital screen with amazing sound. I have chosen to see it at AT&*T park. More legroom. Of course to keep me from going Mad in the open air – I will layer my clothes. Here’s the best part --- It is free to everyone at the Ball Park. Now it’s no longer, take me out to the Ball Park – It’s take me out to the Opera. Gee, all that and hotdogs too? Oh, the hotdogs aren’t free? Date: June 20.

AND THAT’S A WRAP!



The Photo of Lee Hartgrave Boy Reporter is by Jim Ferreira – Film Noir & Hollywood Glamour. www.lafterhall.com.

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